Well, here I go again. My ovarian cancer is active, and my doctors want me to do more chemo to try to stop it. I found out a few weeks ago when I went in for blood work earlier than I was scheduled to because of some suspicious pains I was having. Nothing major, but I knew something wasn't right. I knew it was the cancer.
This seems to be my routine. For the past three years, just as the holiday season approaches, just days before Thanksgiving, I am told "you have cancer or, the cancer is back". Gee thanks. Well I guess I should be thankful that it let's me enjoy my summers before it sets me back on the road to chemotherapy. Of course my doctors want me to start chemotherapy right away, but I'm not ready. I'm close to ready, but not yet willing to subject my body to more poison, at least not until I feel I have no other option, so I am putting myself through beat cancer boot camp. This means more juicing, more supplements, more research, an even more restricted diet, and finding a way to take pleasure in it all. If I can't stop the cancer on my own, at least I will know that I did everything I could to strengthen my defenses against the poisons the doctors have to offer.
I read the following quotes a while ago, and filed them away for times like these, when I feel myself being tempted to accept that this might be the end in a way that feels too close to giving up the fight, because some days I am so exhausted that I think resignation would be a relief. But I know I don't have it in me to give up. I believe in the power of hope. It's all I've got. It's all I need.
Words like these help.
" I can't believe I've come this far
to only come this far"
"Keep the faith. The most amazing things happen
when you are about to give up."
I also find that testimonials from people who have beat cancer are helpful and inspiring, so I have included a couple of links for those of you who are interested. For an online testimonial from a man who treated his cancer with supplements click here. For a compilation of testimonials in book format, there is the book "Radical Remission, Surviving Cancer Against All Odds" by Dr. Kelly Turner Phd., which is enjoyable and inspiring to readavailable here.